


I'm Wasted on You

by Venus_Belfire



Category: Gay - Fandom
Genre: Coming Out, F/F, Fiction, Gay, Homosexual, Lesbian, Love, M/M, Struggle
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-05
Updated: 2017-12-05
Packaged: 2019-02-11 02:52:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12925767
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Venus_Belfire/pseuds/Venus_Belfire
Summary: Based off the cliche and utterly overdone story line of someone who’s fallen for somebody, but fears their relations could be jeopardising their faith.





	I'm Wasted on You

I'm wasted on your taste

I always hope to change, im tired of myself. But now im trying to bring back time that i turned away. All i do is try to resist but its all i want to need. Everythings shattering in my brain, like thin glass and its my own doing. You cant even see that im falling, falling like a fool. Im aware that it's reckless, painfully aware. Impulse and obsession driving my life.

You where entangled in my every thought, just as your body had been entangled in mine. Ive spent my whole life trying to pause my life in moments when your fingers traced my back. I now spend my days trying to press rewind. Starved of your touch and our time. What you dont understand is I dont know what do anymore; without your love I dont know who I am alone anymore. Is it bad i know it was a messy experiment, like a now burnt out fire with no smoke. As your fingers would press to my neck and i would feel myself choke, it wasnt the only time you would leave me breatheless. Im still driving the same lane, im still sane. But now with your drugs in my viens, and withdrawel keeping me awake on this road. No, i cant hold you anymore, knotted into my thoughts. But im unravelling before you, weak under your travelling fingers, under the fabric of my clothes.

If im honest im scared youll go, and not come back this time. That ill spend the rest of my time heartbroke. So in a way i refuse to give my love, scared to show my love incase you go. Because your too good. Im loosing my mind. Its too good to be all i need. As my hands press your thigh and im bresthing in your toxins, your a drug, and im high. Im scared, so i say to myself again that its just for tonight. So ill touch my lips and let it all hit, a wave crashing against my body. Youve got me wasted. Oh god im so wasted. Your too bad for me, to bad to be anything to me. And im gliding through your fingers and for you smile. Its too long since i held your hands, too long since i was a fool for your love.

I cant seem to hold onto my life anymore, time slipping away like silk against my bare skin. When you whisper that you miss me, the air around you tasting of alcahol i admit im kinda moved. But thats you. You with your tear stained cheeks while i lie through my teeth. Im trying to replace a love with something fake; convincing myself its what we both need. Your a sedative to the overflowing voices in my head, and im just trying to keep my faith while thinking of your face: Im loosing you and changing a peice of me, just to get to heaven. Im wasted im so wasted and maybe heaven is wasted on me.


End file.
